back from vacation

i hate my job.

i know everyone hates working, but i really, really hate my job.

like, a lot.

i work in a call center (barf) for namelesstelevisionprovider. sounds easy, right? wrong.

here, i'll show you. let you take a walk in my shoes, so to speak.

you: hello, thank you for calling namelesstelevisionprovider, can i have your name please?

stupid customer: can you have my what?!

you: your name, dumbass. what else would i be asking for?

s.c.: oh my name. sure. it's stupid.

you: thank you, stupid. how can i help you today?

s.c.: (crickets. as in, dead silence. no response at all for an uncomfortably long time.)

you (slower and louder, because clearly s.c. is brain damaged): how... can... i... help... you... today?

s.c. (screaming indignantly): well, you can help me by telling me why my bill is so goddamn high! blah blah blah.

you: well, you have ordered 27 adult pay-per-views in 5 days. also you subscribe to every channel known to man, and you have requested every other add-on and refuse to lose any channels. there is no error, it has been the same since you signed up 10 years ago, and i really don't give a crap about your job/kids/age/whatever, i'm just trying to get through my day and get the hell out of here.

s.c.: well if you don't give me everything i ask for free, i'm going to switch to othernamelesstelevisionprovider! othernamelesstelevisionprovider promises to give me everything for free! no more bills for me! blah blah blah.

you: fantastic. did i mention i couldn't care less? have a nice day! oh and p.s., shit costs money. you want shit, you pay for it. welcome to america.


okay... maybe that's not EXACTLY how my calls go. maybe that's just what i daydream about saying before i snap out of it and say what my bosses tell me to say. but seriously, why does everyone think that just because they are old/young/rich/poor/sick/bored/etc., that they shouldn't have to pay for tv like everyone else? or, my favorite line ever, "we don't even watch tv!" well then why in the hell are you paying for it?

time to start job hunting again.